A World of Dreams
by Kochyo Kurozuru
Summary: This is a fanfiction I've done with an OC and the main characters from Pokemon. Um, the main pairing is Ash and my OC, but there are several other pairings involved. This is a bit of a serious story, but please enjoy. :
1. Prologue

**She was wearing a bright red silk kimono, the color of cherries, with pink blossoms and cranes delicately woven into the fabric. It was cheap; a souvenir bought the one time she went to the mainland. But she loved it nonetheless; some days she would just sit on her bed wrapped up in the gorgeous silk, rubbing it across her cheek with her long lashes closed, pretending that she was beautiful. Today was different though. Today she stood in front of her mirror. Today she felt ugly, hated. Today she felt nothing. She wasn't sure why she was here, what had happened to make it come to this. There was something wrong with her mind. The pills weren't helping.**

**She stared at the silver blade held in her soft white hand, mesmerized by the light running up and down its keen edge. Last time had been with a key; last time had been with tears. This time she felt nothing, no fear, no sadness. Just curiosity. Would her blood be as red as the sleeves of her kimono? **

**She didn't want to die; on the contrary, she loved her life. Loved the green trees and yellow sun and blue sky. What fascinated her was the voices in her head. Something was wrong there and she knew it; her boyfriend knew it, her family knew it. She had told them time and again not to leave her alone, but her terror for quiet wide dark spaces was not heeded. Now the voices wanted to compare her blood with silk. **

**It didn't even hurt. **

**She watched as it congealed on her wrist, then pooled as she dug harder. It began to drip into the sink, filling it up like a thick, rusty rich wine, collected on the edge of the silver knife.**

**Pretty. Said her dizzy thoughts.**

**It wasn't too deep. But her knees felt weak. **

**Almost noncommittal, she realized she was going to faint. She reached forward weakly, her cut arm pressing to the mirror as she tried to steady herself. The mirror was smeared with her blood. Her world tilted sideways as she fell forward, hitting her head on the edge of the counter. **

**Ow.**

**She curled up on the floor, her knees drawn to her chest, her blood dripping to the floor like liquid ruby jewels. Huh, it's darker than cherries.**

**Fuzzy. Her eyes were fuzzy. Then black.**

_I'm done._

I stared at my reflection in the mirror, turquoise eyes red from crying, smudged with mascara, a harsh splotchy red flush spilling across my cheeks. The light in my eyes was gone. I didn't even look at my eyes all that often and I could tell. My heart was broken, beaten to the point where I couldn't take this world anymore. These people.

_No one wants me here. I fucked up so badly._

I stretched my fingers towards myself, watching as my fingertips splayed across the cool glass, the looking glass that always reveals everything you try to hide. Who had I been fooling anyway? Certainly not John. Or Eddie. I had dug myself the deepest hole possible and now couldn't find a stepladder, no helping hand to lift me back up. I was done. Finished.

_I want to leave. Leave here and never return. And never need to say sorry again. I'm so TIRED of saying sorry._

I couldn't see any way out of here. I was stuck, metaphorically, in a land that would never fulfill my dreams, never allow me to achieve the greatness I had so long aspired for. Why? Why couldn't I just step through the looking glass? Alice had done it so easily….

_I wish for another world. His world. The world I've lived in all of my life in my mind. I want it! I need it…._

My palms pressed against that cold, unforgiving glass as it reflected the true mess I had created. The horrible me I had created. How could this have happened? I always tried to do what's right, to love and forgive. So what if I had been a little selfish? Every human is that way! Why can't I have a second chance?

_Yes, a second chance….please. I will prove that I can do better. Just….please….help me up….._

Suddenly, a strange shape appeared behind my reflection. I stared in astonishment as the surface of the mirror rippled, contorting and flexing until a face I knew quite well was staring back at me. Gasping in surprise, I stepped back, pulling my hands away as they threatened to sink through what had once been as solid as crystal.

"_Ash! What the…how're you….?"_

My heartbeat quickened as I gazed into the brown eyes of a boy I had long since given up on. Another one of my mistakes. But his eyes weren't friendly, and neither was his voice as he opened his mouth to speak. "You're Katie right? The girl who wrote that story?" I blinked, for a moment not comprehending his words.

"_Huh? What story…..oh wait! You mean the one I made about you and me and Brock?"_

I was astounded when he nodded his head. "Yea. And the one that fucked everything up. So you'd better get through here and fix it. Now!" His anger lit up his brown eyes with a fiery passion, one I had so long wished to see. Then my cheeks flushed at his harsh tone, anger welling up from my stomach, hot and bubbling.

"_What the hell? All I ever did was write some stupid story! Tell me what, in the name of all that is holy, is going on here!" _

His face darkened and he opened his mouth again to say something, but then turned as if he had heard something behind him. He groaned, exasperated. "I know Brock! But she won't get her ass through here!" Gritting his teeth he turned back to me, attempting to be reasonable. "Please come through here Katie. My entire world is at risk if you don't."

"_Wha-what d'you mean? Why?"_

"Hurry!" he grimaced again, twisting in discomfort, and I saw that the edges of the mirror were starting to harden. If I didn't do something quick, he would be stuck there. I gulped, wondering what the hell this all meant. Then everything clicked into place. This was it! My escape, my get-out-of-jail-free card. And to the pokemon world no less! My pulse quickened as my heart raced, thinking of all the possibilities. So what if Ash was pissed at me? Fuck boys anyway! I'd had enough of them. Within a split second I made my decision.

"_Alright! Move outta the way!"_

A look of relief passed over Ash's face as he nodded. I clambered quickly onto the countertop, nervously watching as the fluid part of the glass grew smaller and smaller. _This is it_. I felt a twinge of regret, looking back over my shoulder, wondering if anyway would miss me. Then I hardened my resolve. I'd had enough of this world that seemed intent to screw me over again and again, that had reveled in the pain it had caused. I was done.

_I love you, mom, dad, nana, my dear sisters. And I'm sorry, but now….I'm gone. Never to trouble you again. Goodbye. _

Taking a deep breath, I took hold of Ash's hand, the fabric of his green glove soft and warm in mine. Our eyes met again, and this time his eyes softened for a split second, pleading for something he had lost, something that perhaps I had left to give. Then it was over, and he yanked me forward. I fell into him, though the looking glass. For a split second I looked back. My brow furrowed as I saw a young girl curled up on the floor in a red kimono, blood surrounding her left arm and head. She had golden curly hair that covered her face. My stomach jumped as I realized….


	2. Chapter 1: Forest

There was a roaring in my ears as I was pulled through water. I was confused, disoriented; a moment ago the mirror was bright and solid, and now I was soaking wet and holding my breath painfully, my lungs restricted by iron bands. The water was cold, too, and though I struggled to keep my eyes open and concentrate on the fact that Ash was paddling ahead of me, my eyes burned, telling me that this was not salt or chlorinated water, but fresh water. When I finally thought I could hold my breath no longer, our heads broke the chilly surface, and I pulled in gasping breaths, struggling not to choke. It was as he was pulling me onto the shore that I realized I was completely naked, save for my glasses, which remained firmly on my nose.

My face bright red, I dropped down onto the banks of the small lake, curling up on my knees and hugging my chest to hide my bare skin. I was shivering; my toes, fingers, and lips numb with cold.

"What the hell?" I murmured angrily. _Why am I naked_? I barely had time to ponder this before someone rushed over to me, and dropped a wonderfully fluffy, and dry, towel around my shoulders. Gratefully, I pulled it close to me. It was big enough to cover my entire body, and as soon as I could feel my toes, I stood up and took in my surroundings, shrewdly recognizing every detail.

I looked around and found that I was standing next to a small clearing in the middle of a forest by a beautiful lake. It was night; stars reflected distortedly in the cool clear water of the pond, which was subtly heart-shaped from the setting of the rocks. Water poured merrily down in little waterfalls to the north of the pond, and flowed in cheerfully babbling streams to the south. I smiled dreamily as I took in the scenery, now completely disregarding the fact that I was naked with only a towel covering me and Ash was shooting me death glares. The soft floor of the forest was carpeted in green grass, and dotted with pretty wild flowers of blue, yellow, and white. Suddenly, I noticed Pikachu, and I stared in delight at its adorable little eyes and cheeks, and its fluffy yellow fur. I was itching to pick him up for a good cuddling, but figured now was the best time. He took a liking to me, however, and curled up around one of my feet. I grinned in spite of myself.

Finally Ash cleared his throat and prodded me in the shoulder. I turned around to see that he was also wrapped in a fluffy towel, and both he and Brock-Brock!- were staring at me: Ash with an angry look and red cheeks, and Brock with a placid interested look, as if I was a mystery to him.

"What?" I asked. Then the weight of what he had said to me through the mirror hits home, and I sagged to the ground again, the familiar guilt pulling me down like an almost physical force. I stared up at them, and I could feel the heartbreak on my face. Pikachu crawled onto my lap, trying to comfort me. Stroking its fur only made me feel a little better.

"What have I done now?" I sighed, struggling to keep my voice neutral. I could tell that I sounded beyond exhausted, like the whole weight of the world was maliciously trying to squish me flat. They heard it too, from what I could read of their faces.

Ash seemed to run out of steam at my expression, his angry look fading, and, stuttering, he launched into the tale, Brock putting a comforting arm around my shoulders as he began.

"Well, it's kind of complicated. You see, I started hearing your voice over a year ago, when I was traveling back home with Brock after visiting Misty in Cerulean City. We had just left Pewter City, and out of nowhere I started hearing a voice narrating a story. Listening harder, I realized it was a girl, and she was crying while narrating. From that point on, I heard everything the girl said regarding this world."

Startled, I stared at him, my face coloring as I realized all those years I had been writing my story, my dream, my wish in my head he had heard bits and pieces….even the embarrassing ones, which I could tell by his red face. I cleared my throat and looked away

"Then, about three weeks ago, time suddenly started slowing down from the moment when we left Viridian City to get to Pallet after a shopping trip. The story line then ran through my head consistently every day, from the moment I awoke, to the moment I went to sleep, even when I was dreaming; the only thing missing was your presence, the presence of the narrator, and soon time got slower and slower for everyone but me, Brock, and Pikachu. I was desperate to return things to normal, and Brock suggested that I should try contacting you. In a dream, I discovered this small lake, a place where I used to fish with my father, and it was here where I could watch you, the water acting like a scrying pool, but you were only truly clear on the full moon. The situation was getting desperate, so tonight I called out to you, not really expecting anything; but then you answered! The rest, well, you know."

I sat completely still, staring at my hands as he finished the story. I felt horrible, the guilt curdling my stomach like a bad tummy ache. Even my imagination had messed up someone's life. Was there really no reason for my existence at all but to make people sad or angry? Images of John's sad eyes flitted through my mind, but I swatted them away, telling myself this wasn't the time or place for self pity. With a sigh, I straightened my back and looked straight into Ash's eyes.

"I'm sorry for what has happened," I began smoothly, willing my voice to remain steady, "But I assure you that I didn't make up that story with this result in mind. I was only looking for an escape. Time should return to normal now that I am here and the storyline can continue. Please forgive me." With this, I gave a low bow to both Ash and Brock, my hair falling forward to hide my flushed cheeks and the tears I could no longer control. My soul was broken, I realized. I think they may have noticed too.

After getting myself under control, I looked up to see Brock nodding, looking surprised and concerned, and Ash shifting uncomfortably, looking at his feet, guilt for his previous behavior on his face.

"Um, why don't you come and stay at my house?" He offered abruptly, looking me in the eye. I turn bright red at this offer, having already started planning on finding a way to procure clothing and find a place to sleep without bothering them any longer. This offer couldn't have been more of a surprise, even though later on I reasoned that this was just Ash's character in the works, caring and giving in abundance.

"Er," I stuttered, switching my gaze between Ash and Brock in embarrassment, not sure what to say. "I really don't want to impose on you any longer. Are you sure…?" I ended lamely, my cheeks and ears surely crimson.

"Come on." He said impatiently, grabbing my hand and pulling me along as I struggled to keep myself covered with the towel. Turning to look at Brock, I'm sure I saw a flicker of a smile cross Brock's face before he catches my eye and nods reassuringly.

"It's ok." He said, with a gentle smile. His dark eyes are warm, which makes me feel calm, along with the warmth of Ash's gloved hand. I sighed, a single tear falling from my eye as the guilt continued to gnaw at me. I had never been very good at managing it. Suddenly, Ash turns his head back making eye contact again, giving me a small, startlingly sweet, smile. I made no reply, simply because it took a lot more than that to make me smile anymore. Instead, I just silently walked forward through this nightmare of my long wished for dream.


	3. Chapter 2: Pallet Town

I stumbled forward, still hand in hand with Ash as he pulled me along, as we finally cleared the thinning trees into a wide meadow. The grass grew tall and sweet, which led me to believe that it was spring, despite the chill in the air. The waist high grass was dotted with flowers, and rippled in the wind like the sea, bending down then springing back up like waves. The stars were fading away as the sun rose gently behind us, casting a warm glow on the fields which sloped shallowly downwards to meet a small town. This was my first glimpse of Pallet.

Ash grinned with pride as he watched my reaction, my round eyes drinking in the cozy simple view before me. Wide tilled fields were dotted here and there with houses among the gentle hills to the north, and to the south a bay sparkled merrily in the dawn's light. On the highest hill to the west stood a huge white building with a rustic looking windmill next to it; while behind it patterns of different biomes fenced in spread like a multi-colored quilt. It could only be Pallet Town's number one attraction: Professor Oak's research laboratory.

With a huge sigh, I breathed out my amazement. "Wow!" It was all I could manage, since the view of a town I'd longed to see had left me virtually speechless.

"Ya like it?" Ash said excitedly, all anger toward me apparently forgotten. "This is where I group up. C'mon. My house is right down this hill to the left." With a cheeky smile, he grabbed my hand again and pulled me down the slope. I frantically clutched the towel to my breast, trying to keep myself concealed as best as possible. The blades of grass were itchy on my legs and feet, and I was continually worried I would hurt my toes on unseen rocks. Brock ran right behind me, easily keeping up with his over-excited friend.

It took a little over ten minutes of running through fields before we got to the road, then only a few short minutes down until a quaint farm house rose into view. We ran around the side of the house to the garden and back door. I stopped for a moment, pulling my hand out of Ash's so I could straighten out my towel, glaring at him as I did so.

"Did we _really_ have to run that fast, Ash? Jeese." I said, as soon as I caught my breath. "Well yeah," he said, looking confused. "You didn't want anyone to see you in just a towel did you?" I looked away, feeling like an idiot. "No."

"There ya go." He said with a chuckle. Brock didn't say anything, but he did nothing to hide his grin. Pikachu wasn't paying attention at all, but rather was nibbling on a carrot it found in the garden. Ash looked at him, then snatched away the carrot, irritated. "Hey, Pikachu. You know you're not supposed to dig up Mom's veggies; she'll get mad."

"Pikachu, pikapi." It said, looking chagrined. Ash just smiled, and picked it up, giving it a little squeeze. "It's ok, buddy. We'll get some breakfast inside." Pikachu chirped happily, giving Ash a lick on the cheek which caused him to laugh. I watched all of this jealously, for I had always wanted a Pokemon of my own.

Brock broke in. "Hey, uh, Ash? Why don't we get inside and get her some clothes? I think she might be catching a cold." Just as I sneezed, too. I gave a cough and looked away, cheeks red. With a sheepish grin, Ash slid the backdoor open, which they had left unlocked the night before when they snuck out. "C'mon in, Katie."


End file.
